![]() ![]() The old man stood there, quivering with fury, stammering as he tried to come up with a real crusher. Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette by skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat! What else was there but a "triple dare you"? And then, the coup de grace of all dares, the sinister triple-dog-dare. ![]() My personal preference was for Lux, but I found Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor - heady, but with just a touch of mellow smoothness. Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. But, I chickened out and said the first name that came to mind. He worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. In the heat of battle my father wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan. Some men are Baptists, others Catholics my father was an Oldsmobile man. Gradually, I drifted off to sleep, pranging ducks on the wing and getting off spectacular hip shots. The greatest Christmas gift I had ever received, or would ever receive. Next to me in the blackness lay my oiled blue steel beauty. Mere child's play compared to what surely awaited me. ![]() What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Hmmph. Only I didn't say "Fudge." I said THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word! Only one thing in the world could've dragged me away from the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window. ![]()
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